Red Alert's Med Bay 2: The Vacation
by Shath
Summary: [Armada] Grab a waste container and cleaning cloths, it's vacation time! Sequel to Red Alert's Med Bay. Features Red Alert, Starscream, Jetfire, Hotshot, Blurr, Sideswipe, Prime, Hoist, Scavenger & the Minicons.
1. We're Going Where?

**Red Alert's Med Bay 2 – The Vacation** **(Armada)**

Just when Red Alert thinks the chaos is finally over... the Autobots go on vacation!

Notes: Just a fun Armada Autobot-centric fan fiction that conveniently ignores the Decepticons. And of course Starscream is with the Autobots. And everyone's a little (or a lot) OOC. There were no children in the original Red Alert's Med Bay, but they appear in this one, albeit briefly. Disclaimer: I do not own Transformers or the Autobots or characters etc. I do own Aqueous, but he's not alive he's just a cruiser so yeah.

**Chapter 1: We're going where?! **

There was a stagnant pause.  
"We're going where?!" Blurr asked.  
"We're going on vacation. The kids thought it would be a wonderful idea, and I agree that we need to get away for a little while," Optimus Prime said joyfully.  
"Where did you have in mind, Optimus?" Red Alert asked, hoping it would be nice and safe. For some reason, he didn't think he was going to be getting much vacation time in personally.  
"We're going on a cruise to an island! Alexis suggested it," Carlos replied, dancing in glee with the other kids.  
"...cruise?" Starscream repeated, instantly disliking the idea.  
"Yeah, on a boat!" Fred clarified unnecessarily.

While the children dashed off to pack their bags, a number of Autobots made various unsuccessful attempts at either talking their way out of it (Blurr), refusing to go (Scavenger) or escaping and hiding (Starscream). In the end, all seven Autobots and five children were assembled in the control room and awaiting their departure on their very first vacation together.  
"Jetfire," Optimus called.  
"Right here Prime!" Jetfire replied enthusiastically.  
"Red Alert," Optimus called.  
"Here. I've packed up all of the medical tools I may need," Red Alert said with a nod.  
"Good. Hotshot?"  
"Here and ready to go, Optimus sir!"  
"Sideswipe?"  
"Here. Are you sure this trip will be safe?"  
"Of course I'm sure. The cruiser is from Cybertron, it's very safe. Blurr?"  
"Must I be here?"  
"Yes. Hoist?"  
"Ready to go, Optimus."  
"Scavenger?"  
"Unfortunately."  
"Come now, I'm sure this vacation will be good fun, and a great chance for us all to relax. And last but not least, Starscream?"

Another stagnant pause followed.  
"Where's Starscream?" After five minutes of searching, somebody finally thought to look upwards.  
"Starscream, get off the roof."  
"No."  
"Don't make me come up there!"  
"No."  
"I'm coming up there!"

Jetfire went up there. While Starscream was being prised from the roof, Optimus checked to make sure all five children were ready to go as well, and that the Minicons were all present and accounted for. He then glanced at the Autobot party to make sure nobody had disappeared after the roll call. When everyone was as ready to go as they were going to be, the Autobots rolled out and onto the Cybertronian cruiser Aqueous. While the children and Minicons scrambled into the Minicon rooms to claim their bunks, Red Alert found a suitable room to set up as a temporary medical facility. Hoist headed up the front to help Optimus control the cruiser, and off they set.

"Now, where can I find me some peace and quiet?" Scavenger asked himself. He headed towards the rear of the ship, trying his best not to step on or trip over excited Minicons, and found a nice open area with large chairs that would be perfect for relaxing on. "Perfect!" The mercenary grinned, and seated himself on the nearest chair. "  
Oops. Sorry. Didn't mean that. Terribly sorry. No, no I did not do that on purpose. Sorry. My apologies. Look, if you didn't walk under my feet, I wouldn't step on you. Autobot coming through. Sorry. OH DEAR PRIMUS!!!" Blurr's shriek startled Scavenger into toppling off his chair. The beeping of Minicons that followed caused the large green Autobot to put his hands over his audios in a futile attempt to drown out the sounds.  
"I thought Prime said this would be relaxing!" he grumbled.

"He tripped over the Minicons," Hotshot explained to an exasperated Red Alert. They had just set off and already there were Autobots in his previously quiet med bay.  
"Which Minicons?" Red Alert asked as he helped Blurr onto the metal table.  
"Those," the blue Autobot said sheepishly, pointing to a pile of disgruntled Minicons. Red Alert sighed. It was going to be a long vacation.  
"Do you need some help?" Hotshot asked, grabbing a tool to hand to the medic and sending three others clattering to the floor.  
"No thanks, I think I'll be right. How about you go out and ask the Minicons to be a little more careful?" Red Alert suggested.  
"Right!" Hotshot said with a vigorous nod, saluting as he did so. Red Alert stifled a relieved sigh.

"And the ship goes up, and then the ship goes down. Then the ship goes up, then the ship goes down," Jetfire recited with a chuckle, poking a sulking Starscream in the arm. Annoying Starscream was one of his favourite hobbies, and it was oh so easy when the red jet was so riled to begin with. Jetfire turned off his optics as he threw his head back to laugh, a laugh that was cut short as he heard Starscream make a curious noise and felt something splatter against his chest, newly cleaned cockpit and previously shiny nosecone. He briefly debated as to whether he should turn his optics online. Maybe it would be better to leave them off.

Red Alert straightened up, his trained optics examining Blurr's frame, searching for any repairs that were still required. Satisfied that the blue Autobot was fully repaired, he opened his mouth to announce that Blurr could leave the med bay when the door opened. Please let them be here to visit Blurr or the Minicons, Red Alert begged silently. The voyage had just started, and already he had had to fix up Blurr, and would need to check over some of the Minicons. There couldn't really be another patient, could there?

Turning around slowly, he was rather surprised at what he saw. Jetfire had a rather deadpan expression on his face, and his front was stained pink with Energon. He was supporting a rather limp Starscream, whose optics were on the ground, momentarily exhausted. Red Alert sighed; he couldn't say he didn't expect at least one case.  
"Put him on the table," Red Alert, said, patting the nearest table to the door.  
"On second thoughts, put him on that one," he said, pointing to the one nearest the restroom door. He remembered last time. He then dashed to get a waste container; he definitely remembered last time! Red Alert stubbornly ignored Blurr's snorting giggles as the blue Autobot took in the sight of Jetfire, who stuck his tongue out at Blurr before remembering that he had a facemask on.

The medic made sure Starscream was comfortable on the table, then turned to direct Jetfire to the cleaning cloths (of which he had brought many), when the door to the med bay opened.  
"Hey Red, Sideswipe here isn't feeling too well..." Hotshot began. Sideswipe took one look at the pink-stained Jetfire, then almost made Red Alert's med bay that little bit less clean. But Hotshot was on the ball; he grabbed the nearest waste container in time, and Red Alert was so pleased by this he didn't care that Hotshot managed to set off a sort of domino effect with the tools. He would pick them up later.


	2. In Which Things get a Little Bit Worse

**Chapter 2: In Which Things get a Little Bit Worse **

The Minicons beeped in disgruntlement. Red Alert would not have time to see them for a while. Still, they were concerned for the ill Autobots. They scattered when Blurr neared them, and the blue Autobot felt so guilty he sat down and talked with them until they were all friends again. At least someone was doing something remotely constructive. Hotshot was being his usual useful self, knocking down two tools for each one he picked up. At this rate, Red Alert thought sourly, they would all get on the floor.

Oh no... "You're not putting the dirty tools with the clean ones, are you?" Red Alert asked, whirling around suddenly.  
"Um..." Hotshot looked guiltily at the tools on the bench.  
"Ok, think Hotshot. Which ones need cleaning?" Red Alert asked after taking a deep breath.  
"Um..." Hotshot fidgeted. He didn't remember.  
"You don't remember? WELL CLEAN THEM ALL!" Red Alert's yell surprised Starscream beside him, who jumped a little, upsetting his stomach and...

"The waste container was RIGHT THERE, it was RIGHT BESIDE YOU! How could you possibly miss it?" The medic shrieked. "No... oh no, I'm sorry Starscream I didn't mean it... please don't cry! I'm just tired, that's all. I didn't mean to yell at you! Starscream..." Red Alert was flustered for the first time in ages. He felt guilt flow through him like never before; how could he yell at Starscream like that! And now the poor jet had his face screwed up, tears at the ready...  
"Aw, my poor baby!" Jetfire exclaimed dramatically as he re-entered the main med bay, now reasonably clean. He wrapped his arms around Starscream as best he could from his standing position. Starscream hiccupped, and then turned his optics offline to rest.

Crisis averted. With a deep sigh (he seemed to be doing that so often lately), Red Alert grabbed a clean cloth and started to clean up after assuring Hotshot that he didn't need any help doing so. He then glanced at Starscream. The jet acted so oddly when ill. But then again Starscream was always a little odd. The medic moved over to Sideswipe, who was snoring rather loudly. Let him sleep, thought Red Alert.

While both patients slept, Red Alert quickly looked over the Minicons then sent them off to play. He then went to check on Starscream and shoo Jetfire away from the jet, afraid that the shuttle's incessant poking and prodding would finally wake the red jet. He gave Jetfire a stern look, and then winced as he heard a tremendous clatter behind him. Turning around, he saw a very guilty looking Hotshot staring down at the pile of tools he had just cleaned, which had once more found their way to the ground. Red Alert turned around and took yet another deep breath. He glanced at Sideswipe, who snorted briefly before returning to his snoring, then down at Starscream, who was stirring.

"Hush Starscream, it's ok. Go back to sleep," Red Alert cooed frantically, rubbing the jet's arm in the hopes that he would just return to sleep. Autobots were just so much easier to deal with when unconscious. With a cough and a splutter, which delivered a small amount of pink Energon onto Red Alert, Starscream awoke. And he was cranky. He was not instantly aware of where he was, he felt ill and he had just been rudely awoken by a loud noise. So Starscream did was he always did when he was cranky. He shrieked at the top of his metallic lungs.

"No, shhhh!" Red Alert tried desperately to quieten the shrieking jet, glancing over at Sideswipe. Jetfire clamped his hand over Starscream's mouth, and then shrieked himself as Starscream's bit him.  
"Bad Starscream!" Jetfire reprimanded, attempting to wrestle his hand away from the jet. At least they were being reasonably quiet about it. Red Alert quietly made his way over to Sideswipe, who suddenly yelled out something about jam before snoring once more. With another deep sigh (he really had to stop doing that), Red Alert headed back over to the fliers, gently removing Jetfire's hand and checking on Starscream before moving to repair the damage the red jet's fangs had caused.

Starscream fell into a light sleep, and Red Alert was impressed that Hotshot remained reasonably quiet as he cleaned the med bay tools once more, this time more carefully. Once Jetfire's hand was fixed, the shuttle behaved himself. For a few minutes, at least. When the med bay door opened again, it was not a patient that entered, to the medic's relief.  
"Red Alert, how are things..." Optimus Prime's voice was cut off as Red Alert whirled around and waved his hands wildly, signally for the Autobot leader to stay quiet. Starscream cried out in protest briefly, but did not actually wake, drifting back into sleep while Jetfire watched him, wondering how badly Red Alert would hurt him if he poked the red jet now.

"Things are going alright, Optimus," Red Alert replied quietly.  
"Sideswipe's been asleep the whole time; he's a very heavy sleeper. Starscream's woken once or twice but so far he's alright." He then noticed that Optimus was staring at his chest, and looking down Red Alert realised that he had forgotten to clean up the Energon stains from when Starscream had last woken. Grabbing a cloth, he carefully made sure not to soil more than a small corner of it as his cloth supply seemed to be dwindling. He had to make it last the whole trip!

"I've been helping clean things," Hotshot said proudly, remembering to speak softly.  
"Because you dropped them," Jetfire reminded him with a grin that lit up his optics. Red Alert gave both stern looks to ensure they didn't even think about arguing.  
"You'll be pleased to know that everyone else is doing alright. Hoist's taking care of the cruiser, Scavenger's relaxing around the back, and Blurr and the kids are playing with the Minicons. It's a shame you can't come out and relax yourself, Red," and then Optimus Prime, leader of the Autobots, said the stupidest thing imaginable. "Would you like me to look after these two while you go and enjoy yourself for a while?"

At first, Optimus Prime thought his job would be easy. Sideswipe was snoring contentedly, occasionally mumbling about jam and how it belonged to Hotshot, and Starscream was asleep as well. Hotshot was cleaning the tools and carrying them over to the bench one by one as he cleaned them. Jetfire was sitting beside Starscream's table, poking the jet when he thought Optimus wasn't looking.

Autobots were easy to deal with when asleep. When awake, it was not always the same story. Starscream awoke with a gurgle and moan, bringing a concerned Optimus to his side while Jetfire backpedalled rather rapidly into the table behind him. Starscream opened his mouth, and then yawned sleepily before wriggling his feet restlessly. Jetfire sighed, earning a quizzical look from Optimus before the leader returning his attention to Starscream.  
"How are you feeling, Starscream?" Optimus asked as Jetfire headed over to give the red jet a pat on the shoulder. ... How was he feeling? What kind of question was that? They must darn well know how he felt. Starscream opened his mouth a few times as he considered possible answers, before his optics glazed over. A snort from Sideswipe attracted Prime's attention, and he looked over at the blue Autobot.

A nasty cough from Starscream brought his attention back to the jet, but then he had to look over at Jetfire, who was now underneath the metal table.  
"... Jetfire?" Optimus asked.  
"Uh..." Jetfire was unsure of what to say.  
"Uh, well, I thought Starscream was going to..." he ducked once more as Starscream coughed again. Sideswipe started crying about jam, so Optimus moved over to see what the problem was, leaving Jetfire and Starscream.

Starscream started to feel a bit better, and after thinking about what had just happened, found a new game to play, involving scaring Jetfire. After making a few sounds that sent the shuttle under the table, Starscream settled down to rest again, ignoring the clang of Sideswipe falling off his metal table with a shriek of, "MARMALADE!!" Suddenly, the red jet jerked upwards.  
Jetfire laughed. "You're not going to fool me again with..." Splatter. He didn't bother looking down at himself this time; he just reached for a cloth.

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There are 4 chapters in total of this, I hope to post one a day. And now, to thank my reviewers, because I love reviews.

Update? Well, as you command, OptimusxElita4ever! I checked out your fics, they're sweet .  
I'm glad you enjoy the wackiness blood shifter, the wackiness shall continue!  
Storm Blue Lightning Saix: Just wait until you see the last chapter, Red Alert's day gets even worse! Poor Red indeed.


	3. The Island of NOT IN MY MED BAY!

**Chapter 3: The Island of NOT IN MY MED BAY! **

Optimus was rather relieved to see a relaxed-looking Red Alert re-enter the med bay. The medic looked around. Things didn't seem too hectic, really, although Prime was in quite a hurry to leave. Hotshot had cleaned all of the tools, and thoroughly cleaned all of the dirty cloths as well. He was now cleaning the clean ones, but Red Alert didn't see any sense in stopping him. A busy Hotshot was a not-knocking-over-too-many-tools Hotshot, as a general rule. Jetfire was sulking in the corner, wiping his pink-stained cockpit. Sideswipe was lying on his metal table, muttering about marmalade and how jam was butter, and other nonsensical things of that nature. Starscream was awake, but appeared quite settled, albeit a tad fidgety.

Red Alert inspected the tools and arranged them properly, then turned around to see that Jetfire had finished cleaning up and was now prodding Starscream and glaring at him.  
"It wasn't his fault, Jetfire," Red Alert pointed out, moving towards them to mediate. Well, he hoped it wasn't Starscream's fault. He hadn't actually been there.  
"You're right," Jetfire said with a sigh, to the medic's relief. "I'm sorry I've been annoying you so much, Starscream." Starscream turned to look directly up at the shuttle, surprised by the apology.  
"And Starscream's sorry he was sick on you, aren't you Starscream?" Red Alert encouraged the red jet, who nodded in agreement. Jetfire grinned and was back to his jovial self.

"The jam turned into marmalade!! Marmalade I tell you!" Sideswipe cried out, falling off his metal table. Red Alert bit back a sigh and moved to help Hotshot pick up the blue Autobot, who amazingly was still asleep. Jetfire grinned down at Starscream, and then poked his helmet. With a chuckle he poked the jet's chest, then his arm, then his cockpit, each poke earning a growl.  
"Stop it Jetfire," Red Alert said, not even looking behind him.  
"How did you know?" the shuttle asked. Starscream grumbled and turned his optics off, falling into a light sleep.

Jetfire couldn't help but grin as he heard Red Alert mumble about the state of the temporary med bay. The medic wiped up stains here and there, scowling as a few stubborn ones refused to leave, and arranged the tools neatly once more, checking each one to ensure it was as clean as possible. Jetfire glanced up at Hotshot, and pointed to Starscream then Red Alert. With a grin, the yellow Autobot made his way over to the fliers. Very carefully, Jetfire slid his hand below Starscream's cockpit and down to his lower panel, gently trying to encourage it to open. Hotshot quietly filled a small container with warm water and brought it over, glancing over his shoulder as he did so to make sure the medic had not picked up on what they were doing. With a mischievous grin, Jetfire let a bit of water trickle over Starscream's cockpit, and stifled a giggle as the jet shifted about, bringing up his legs a little.

Red Alert wiped over the bench, and satisfied that it was cleaned, turned around to see what was going on behind him. Hotshot and Jetfire jerked their heads up as they saw the medic turn around. Red Alert took one look at what they were doing, and exploded. The Autobots ducked as the furious medic threw an empty waste container at their heads, narrowly missing Hotshot. Grabbing a wrench, Red Alert advanced on them, and with a yelp the pair found themselves cornered. Towering above them, the medic did his best to look intimidating, and by the look of fear on their optics, he was doing a pretty good job of them. He waved the wrench threateningly at Hotshot, who ducked into the restroom to hide with a yelp.

Red Alert turned to Jetfire and took a much needed deep breath to calm himself, before informed the shuttle that any mess that occurred in his med bay between now and when the cruiser landed on the island would be completely cleaned up by Jetfire. Just as he had finished talking, the barely audible click of Starscream's lower panel opening was heard. Red Alert did not turn around, merely crossing his arms and trying not to grin as he watched the shuttle leap up and dash for a cloth. Starscream may have been a light sleeper, and he may have woken last time something of this nature had occurred, but this time Jetfire had asked for it, and he received it. Red Alert could barely contain his sniggering as he watched the hapless shuttle try to hold the cloth in place with one hand and reach another with his other hand. With a shake of his head, the medic grabbed the cloths and handed them to Jetfire.

Peace quickly returned to the med bay after the incident, with Hotshot returning to a rather calm scene. Red Alert was quietly cleaning the wrench he had dropped after threatening them with it, Sideswipe and Starscream were sleeping and Jetfire was preparing to wash some very wet cloths as soon as he washed his very wet hands. Hotshot offered to help, which the shuttle was very grateful for. They had just finished when Hoist had come down to announce that they had landed on the island.

"Land! Sweet, sweet land!" Sideswipe cried as he sat up, awake and lively, and feeling fine once he was off the cruiser. Starscream loped along behind Jetfire, oblivious to what had just happened in the med bay, and rather nervous as he disliked the way the shuttle was grinning at him, a grin that was so obvious it could be seen despite the fact that Jetfire wore his golden facemask.

Red Alert decided that if anyone required medical attention while on the island, they could come get him. Relaxing in the sand beside Optimus, Hoist and Scavenger, the group watched as Hotshot and Sideswipe played with the kids and Minicons, who had brought some balls to play with. Optimus smiled, pleased that everyone seemed to be having a good time. He looked over to where Starscream was building a sandcastle with Swindle and a few other Minicons, while Blurr watched. Jetfire was digging a hole beside them. During an intermission, the kids came over to admire Starscream and Blurr's sandcastle, as the blue Autobot had decided to help build it and Starscream had allowed him. The Jetfire thought it would be fun to knock it down, so he jumped on it. This started a brief sand fight, which Red Alert promptly broke up, scolding at them for getting sand in their systems. After helping each one to clear out the sand, the medic left them to help Jetfire dig his hole.

As the sun dipped deeper in the sky, the Autobots started getting ready to return to the base. The kids and Minicons were relaxing in the sand with the others, as was Hotshot. Sideswipe came over to investigate the large hole that had been dug. Jetfire and Blurr had moved off to talk to Optimus about something, leaving Starscream sitting alone beside the hole.  
"That's a pretty big hole," Sideswipe commented.  
"That hole will need to be filled in before we leave," Optimus Prime reminded the group. Starscream glanced up at the small Autobot beside him, and then gave him a shove, sending Sideswipe face first into the hole with a yelp.  
"Starscream, that wasn't very nice," Red Alert reprimanded lightly as he moved to help Sideswipe out of the hole.  
"Yeah, Optimus meant with sand!" Hotshot said with a grin. After the hole was filled in and everybody was ready, they reboarded the cruiser. Sideswipe was reluctant to go, and Optimus would not allow Starscream to fly back.  
"Should I hurl now or wait until we're on the boat?" he asked as Jetfire pushed him towards the cruiser.

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Ok, so the title wasn't as apt as it could be. I found this chapter to be a little less exciting than the others, although it does bring the return of lower panel chaos, plus Red Alert explodes. I'm sorry the island part was so short, I couldn't think of much to happen there, especially since there is no med bay on the island, and this story is about Red Alert's Med Bay, so yeah... anyway, thanks once again to the wonderful reviewers.

Blood shifter: Yes, poor Optimus must have had a silly moment. What was he thinking, volunteering to look after the med bay! It was a nice thing to do for Red Alert, though.  
OptimusxElita4ever: Thanks, I enjoy the relationship I've set up with those two in this series. Fear not, more is to come. I'm glad you like Sideswipe's dreams, because they are in this chapter too. Fear the marmalade!!  
Storm Blue Lightning Saix: Yay, my humour fic is funny! That's always a relief.  
Darthphantom117: Really? Best story EVA?!!?! You make me happy :)

I'm not usually one for adding comments under my fictions, but I felt the need to acknowledge my reviewers, as I love reading the reviews. Is a story still a story if nobody reads it?


	4. Poke poke!

**Chapter 4: Poke ****poke**

The trip back started rather pleasantly compared to the trip across. Starscream was feeling alright, slightly tired from lack of Energon, but otherwise spent the trip out of the med bay. He headed up to watch Optimus and Hoist steering the ship, and settled himself on a small ledge to casually watch what was going on, striking a remarkable resemblance to a cat. As Optimus Prime was there, Jetfire was unable to annoy Starscream, so he moved off to annoy Hotshot instead.

"Poke poke!" Jetfire said as he poked Hotshot.  
"Poke poke!" Hotshot repeated, poking Jetfire back. Jetfire stared at him. Hotshot was... poking him back? Starscream never poked him back. Why was Hotshot grinning? Well this was no fun! Jetfire stalked off to find someone else to poke.  
"What was that all about?" Scavenger asked as he came to check on Sideswipe and Hotshot.  
"No idea," Sideswipe replied with a shrug. "Poke!" he added, poking Hotshot. And so began the poking game.

"Hey Scavenger..." Blurr came to an abrupt halt as he caught sight of Hotshot and Sideswipe taking turns poking each other, verbalising the action each time. "... What are they doing?"  
"They're poking each other," Scavenger explained.  
"Well I can see that, but... why?" Blurr asked.  
"Your guess is as good as mine," the green Autobot mercenary replied.

The poking game quickly became popular with the Minicons, who scurried about the Cybertronian cruiser poking each other and any unfortunate Autobot that stood still long enough to get poked. Starscream had almost fallen asleep when he caught sight of something small and red enter the room. He looked up to see Swindle standing in front of him, a small pack of Minicons behind him.  
"Beep!" Swindle declared as he poked Starscream's arm. The Minicons beeped with laughter as they ran off, the three Autobots in the room staring after them.  
"No matter where I am, they still find me!" Starscream exclaimed, putting his hands over his head and glancing around with feigned paranoia. Optimus and Hoist stared at him.

The door slid open to admit Jetfire, the one who had inadvertently commenced the cruiser-wide poking game. He loitered around the back, waiting until both Hoist and Optimus were considerably engrossed in taking care of the cruiser. Then he leapt on top of Starscream. Hoist cringed as Starscream emitted a piercing shriek.  
"Jetfire!" Optimus exclaimed in reprimand. The shuttle grinned as he sat atop a squirming, writhing jet. Just as he did so, the door opened.

Red Alert was pleased. Nobody seemed to require medical attention, so that left him free to finally relax. After taking a brief walk around the cruiser, he decided to pop in and see how Optimus and Hoist were doing, and presumably Starscream as well as he had yet to spot the red jet. The door slid open to reveal a rather odd scene. It appeared that Jetfire had just launched himself on top of Starscream, and was now sitting on the disgruntled jet. Optimus Prime had just started to move forwards to mediate, but stopped to look up at Red Alert as he entered.  
"Get off him, Jetfire," the medic commanded, crossing his arms as he moved over to them, a stern expression on his face.  
"Uh, Jetfire? I think you should do what he says, Starscream isn't looking so hot," Hoist said, pointing to the sullen jet.

"Jetfire, if you make him..." Red Alert began. Jetfire suddenly found himself hoisted into the air by Optimus only moments before Starscream, his tank thoroughly churned from having Jetfire rough him up, hurled the contents of his tank quite violently onto Red Alert in front of him. There was a moment of pause in which Jetfire had the decency to look as guilty as possible. Red Alert flicked the pink Energon from his arms onto the already stained floor, and then took a very deep breath.  
"Jetfire," the medic began, voice dangerously calm, "you will help me bring Starscream to the cruiser's med bay where you will clean him up, and then you will return here with two cloths to clean up this mess. Then you will wash all of the cloths until they are cleaner than when I first got them. And then you will wash each and every tool until it shines so much that it hurts to look at them!" With that, the medic put his arm around Starscream and started to lift him. The shuttle gulped, and then hurried over to help carry Starscream before Red Alert became angry.

After sitting Starscream on a metal table with a waste container, Red Alert moved off to clean up the pink Energon. Jetfire took some cloths and a container of warm water and started to clean Starscream up, determined to be on his best behaviour for the rest of the trip as he did feel very guilty, both for Starscream and for Red Alert. When the shuttle had Starscream's red and white armour shining, he made sure the jet was settled before taking the last few clean cloths and heading off to clean up the last of the mess. When he arrived there, Hoist volunteered to help him.

Back at the med bay, Red Alert had his own armour shining, and since Jetfire had been so nice to Starscream and behaved himself, the medic decided to give the shuttle a head start with the cleaning of the cloths by rinsing them after he checked on Starscream, who was either resting or sleeping lightly, he couldn't quite tell which. When Jetfire returned, he continued to be on his best behaviour, so Red Alert didn't make him clean all the tools after all. Besides, Hotshot had done a reasonable job on the trip over.

By the time they had landed, the cruiser's med bay was blissfully peaceful with Red Alert relaxing on one of the tables. Jetfire and Starscream had headed off to play with the kids, and nobody else had entered the med bay since then. The Autobot medic was one of the first off the cruiser, glad to be back in the Autobot headquarters, and in his own med bay. He briefly inspected each tool that he had brought on the trip as he placed it back where it rightfully belonged in his med bay, and piled up the nice, clean cloths. He cleaned then stacked the waste containers, and then stretched, feeling rather refreshed now that the vacation was over. Things could get back to normal.

Red Alert turned around as the med bay door slid open, and could not stop his jaw dropping ever so slightly as Hotshot, Sideswipe, Blurr and a batch of Minicons tumbled fell into his med bay, sporting slight dents from excessive poking, as well as a grumbling Scavenger, who was complaining about sand in his circuitry. Yes, everything was going back to normal. With a deep sigh, Red Alert grabbed his tools and instructed everyone to hop onto a metal table. It was going to be one of those days. But then again, when wasn't it one of those days? Red Alert asked himself. Chaos and mess always seemed to find their way into Red Alert's Med Bay.

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Thanks once again to my reviewers, I hope you all enjoy this final chapter of Red Alert's Med Bay 2. I'll update if I bring out a third, but I don't have a plan for one and right now I'm very busy with Uni so no guarantees. I'm also hoping to write and finish some different fics (mainly Starscream-centric of course) worthy of uploading.


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